A Chinese writer once said "Patriotism is the memory of foods eaten in childhood." A good definition, and one that points out that every country has patriots, not just us. We love what we are used to, and every place is someone's country. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't love our own place with all the fiber of our being.
To me, being American means participating in and contributing to the world/universe via the culture into which I was born. We share traits and outlook that Senegalese and Tibetan and Spanish people don't. They’re not better traits and outlook; just that I share these particular ones with other Americans. It means I don't have to explain American things to other Americans, which contributes to the feeling of home and comfort and taking off my shoes. It means that the evergreen trees and gray skies of the Pacific Northwest, and the sheer beauty of where I have lived most of my life, is a place I want passionately to protect, simply because it is so beautiful and I feel it is my responsibility.
Being American means the Creator spirit, whoever you conceive her to be, has placed me here. So in gratitude I feel I should try to live my life so that I add to its goodness and beauty and wisdom, or at the least do no harm. There is a poem I am fond of, by Mary de la Valette. It goes "I do not have to go / to Sacred Places/ in far-off lands / the ground I stand on/ is holy." I interpret that to mean that ALL places on the earth are sacred and worthy of love. None more that any other.
And that's how I feel about America. It's a sacred bit of earth. It's my country because I was born here and raised in its culture. It's like any other attribute — brown eyes, arthritic knees, artistic talent. It's up to me what I do with these attributes. I look on them — all of them, even the ones that are "negative" (such as arthritis) as gifts, and I see it as my responsibility as a thinking, feeling being to do the best I can with what I've been given. If I choose to live in America, then I want to help make it a good place for people to live. If it is failing in that, then I want to fight to make it better. If it has things to be proud of, then I want to celebrate them.
Of course values such as integrity, generosity, kindness, etc., are of primary importance to me, way more important than simple patriotism. I think the saying "my country right or wrong" is the height of idiocy. I've never really thought of myself as patriotic — the word itself is sexist and it only serves to divide us. Some day, if the earth endures that long, our species will probably think of ourselves only as earthlings, and instead of patriotism we'll talk of planetism or something. Which will be just as meaningless and sectarian as the word patriotism has come to mean.
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